


The Odds Are In Our Favor

by cellard00rs



Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: (Belated) Holidays, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Mentions Of The Novelization, Post-Drift, Post-Movie, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-08-15
Updated: 2013-08-15
Packaged: 2017-12-23 15:08:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/927939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cellard00rs/pseuds/cellard00rs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hermann invites Newt to his family estate with the intention of irritating his relatives. This backfires in the most spectacular way possible.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Odds Are In Our Favor

Hermann had read the card several times and while he didn’t see much reason in reading it yet again, he found himself doing so.

It was an invitation to come home for the holidays and it was written with great flourish on expensive cream-coloured cardstock. Honestly, how had his mother even managed this? The idea that the postal service was still operational seemed inconceivable. The world had just barely been saved from destruction, the war had been raging for years and yet somehow there was still post?

But then again, it never did do to underestimate Helen Gottlieb. She was a force to be reckoned with and if she wanted a hand written letter delivered to her son than no force on Earth (or not of this Earth – such as kaiju) would stop her from seeing it done. Frankly, Hermann had always been surprised that Pentecost had not drafted her into their ranks but perhaps that was due to his father. After all, Lars Gottlieb was one of the biggest supporters of the Perimeter Program and he would not have approved of his wife helping with a project that he viewed as having little to no value.

Not that he had felt that way at first. Initially Lars had participated with the Jaeger program but eventually he had switched gears or, as he put it - ‘come to a better hypothesis’ – and started overseeing construction of the Wall. It had been a bitter issue between father and son. Like most things. In fact, Hermann had not spoken with his father in years and had barely spoken with his mother as a result. Hence another reason the card was a shock.

Still, the whole thing was a completely futile effort. Not only had the holidays long since passed but as far as Hermann was concerned nothing could or would be accomplished by his returning home. While the Breach was closed and the war was conceivably over, that did not change the fact that there was still work to be done within the Shatterdome. Tossing aside his scientific endeavors to travel to his family’s estate for a no doubt chilly reception was low on his list of priorities.

But then Karla had interfered.

Karla was Hermann’s older sister and a bloody menace to all of society as a whole.

Hermann had been in the lab, working away at his chalkboard only to have a persistent beeping sound interrupt his train of thought. At first he had thought it had had to be something of Doctor Geiszler’s but seeing as he had had yet to even see Geiszler this morning he quickly ruled out that possibility. However, he eventually traced the sound to Newton’s laptop which sat open on his cluttered desk. Hermann hit several keys, trying to stop the noise only for the screen to change to that of a video of his sister.

He blinked at it in confusion, “Karla?”

“Hermann! Thank god, I thought you were never going to answer!”

“What-what are you doing on New-” He shook his head and quickly corrected himself, “I mean, Doctor Geiszler’s computer?”

“Always did underestimate my skills, brother dear. I couldn’t get any access to _your_ computer but this one was easy enough to hack. Then from there I tapped into Skype and here we are! By the way, you look _awful_. I forgot about how weird and angular your face is! Clearly I’m the only one with good looks in this family.”

Hermann rolled his eyes as Karla tossed her long, dark hair about her shoulders and he intoned sarcastically, “Hmm, yes, you look just lovely.”

She smirked, “I would have called but I knew you wouldn’t pick up.”

“True. Now tell me what it is that you want.”

“As abrasive as ever, I see. You know, mother tells me you complain about this…what’s-his-name? You know? The one you work with? Your lab partner? He’s got some lizard name…Salamander?”

“You’re speaking about Doctor Newton Geiszler.” He returned tersely, stressing not only Newton’s name but his title, though as to why he had no real idea past his normal irritation at his sister’s patronizing tone.

“Yes, well, Mother says you complain about him quite often but I’m sure he has good grounds to do so about you. Your social skills are certainly lacking.”

“Get to the point.”

She let out an aggravated groan, “I’m checking to see if you plan on coming home. I know you missed Christmas but you must have received Mother’s card by now.”

“I have and I’m not. Good day.” Hermann went to close the laptop but the sharp look in Karla’s blue eyes struck him, “But you have to!”

“I don’t have to do anything.”

“Oh, yes you do! You have no idea how Mother’s been since you and Father started this foolish falling out business. She’s practically prostrate with grief.”

“ _Our_ mother?” Hermann scoffed with disbelief and Karla’s eyes softened, “Yes. Truly. She’s-she’s very much beside herself, Hermann. She hasn’t had all her children together under one roof in ages and she’s not getting any younger. And unlike you, Dietrich, and Bastien I live close by and _I’m_ the one who has to hear about it! _I’m_ the one who has to deal with it!”

Hermann sucked in a loud breath and shook his head, “It would be a bad idea. Besides, I have my work.”

“What work? The war is over! The Breach is sealed, the monsters gone! You deserve a break! Maybe if you took one you wouldn’t look so,” she waved in his direction, “You know…”

“No, I do not know. Besides, our previous family gatherings would suggest that this would not be the sort of ‘break’ I would deserve, much less wish to take.”

Karla raised one eyebrow, “Is this because we tease you about being alone? Because we know not to expect a plus one from you? Because if it is, it’s very childish of you.”

That was one reason. Hermann would never admit such a thing aloud but, yes, that was indeed one reason. Amongst many others. Many others that he was about to list only to have Karla interrupt, “You know what? Fine. Just forget it. If you’re going to be that much of a baby about it…”

“I’m not being a baby!” He hissed.

“Oh, please! You’re the biggest baby I know and _that’s_ why you’re still single and miserable! It’s not our fault that you can’t find anyone to put up with that strange triangle you call a face!”

Hermann sputtered, more than ready to spew some vitriol right back at her when Newt wandered into the lab. He was clearly still half asleep, which wasn’t a new occurrence, but one that never failed to annoy Hermann. His glasses were askew and he was yawning, scratching at the back of his bedraggled hair. He had on a pair of plaid boxers, a faded Led Zeppelin t-shirt, a ratty robe and what appeared to be plush kaiju slippers.

Still oblivious to anything he wandered over to the small kitchenette and struggled to make coffee, mumbling the whole while, “...an’ tha’s why Kaiceph had tha’ lymph node gland...’s all very logical…”

Hermann was used to this as well. Sometimes, when Newt first woke up, he was still lost in one of his dreams. Some of which revolved around discussing various kaiju and their more particularly interesting attributes. Again, something that normally rankled but today…today…

Today the sight of Newt sparked something within Hermann. Something evil and amusing and he turned to Karla with a big grin, “Karla, I’ve changed my mind. I will come home for the holidays. And I will have a plus one.”

§

Newt blinked, opened his mouth and then closed it again.

Hermann sneered, “I wish I had known before now that it was this easy to shut you up. If I had, I would have invited you home long before now.”

Newt frowned and tilted his head to one side as he continued to try and absorb what Hermann had just asked him. Finally his brain and mouth seemed to catch up with one another, “You-you want me,” he pointed to himself, “ _Me_ \- to come home with you? Go home with you to meet your family?”

“Yes, I do believe that that was exactly what I just asked not more than three minutes ago.”

“Why?”

“Why not?”

Newt’s lower lip jutted out thoughtfully as he nodded to himself, “Okay, fair enough. It’s true, I don’t have much else going on but…mean, come on, Hermann…it’s not like you and I are besties or anything.”

“‘Besties’?” Hermann practically spit the word out and Newt couldn’t help it – he found it oddly endearing, smiling as he explained, “Best friends, Hermann. It’s short for best friends. That’s what all the cool kids are saying these days.”

“Then why are you saying it?”

“Wellllll, that being the case then, no. No, I will not come home with you. Good luck!” Newt made as if to leave the lab but Hermann’s hand shot out, grabbing one end of the belt around his ratty robe, effectively halting him.

“Wait! I,” Hermann squeezed his eyes tightly shut, looking particularly pained before he continued, “I apologize. You are, in fact, quite…cool.”

Newt grinned at Hermann’s accent rolling over that last word, his eyes widening, “Wow, never thought I’d hear you say either one of those things. Can you repeat that?”

Hermann gritted his teeth, “Doctor Geiszler…”

Taking pity on his fellow scientist, Newt clapped a hand on his shoulder, “Hey, don’t hurt yourself. I’ll go, I’ll go.”

Hermann released his belt, “Really?”

Newt patted his shoulder then released him, shrugging, “My Mom’s pretty busy so I don’t think she’ll have much time for me. Besides, it’ll be interesting to see your family in the flesh. Only saw brief flickers of them when we, uh…you know…”

Their eyes darted away from one another’s, as they always had a tendency to do whenever their shared Drift was brought up. Neither one of them had really spoken about it. What was there to say? They had seen each other’s memories, their thoughts, and their feelings…not to mention those of the kaiju hive mind. It was difficult to put into words. Some things, it seemed, were better left unsaid.

At least for now.

So, Hermann looked back at him first, standing up as straight as he could, “Yes, well, I doubt they will disappoint. All I ask is that you be yourself. That’s important, Doctor Geiszler, just be yourself.”

Newt sighed, “Dude, after everything that’s happened, the least you can do is call me Newton. I understand that Newt might be a bit of a stretch, but if we’re going to be around your family it would be nice if you could at least call me by my first name.”

“I have called you by your first name before.”

He snorted, “Yeah, but like, only if one of us is in mortal peril! Just…come on…do this for me, will ya? Mean…I _am_ doing you a favor.”

“Yes, yes, very well,” Hermann resignedly agreed, “Newton it is.”

Newt beamed and patted his shoulder again, “See? Was that so hard?”

Hermann’s dark eyes rolled towards the heavens, “Lord give me strength…”

“I thought your ‘Lord’ resided in numbers. Shouldn’t you, I don’t know, come up with some _equation_ to give you strength or maybe start praying to the almighty number forty two?”

“Hmm, I suppose you’re right. It is the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe, and everything, after all.”

There was a short silence and then Newt started laughing, his expression one of pure joy, “Oh my god, did you just make a joke! You did, didn’t you? And you’ve read ‘Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy’?”

“I am not illiterate, Newton.”

“But _that_ book!”

Hermann felt himself flush and hoped it wasn’t showing in his cheeks. Newt looked so happy though that Hermann couldn’t help but feel a slight lift in the center of his chest. He did his best to ignore it as he demurred, “It was one of my brother Bastien’s favourites. Mother used to read it to us before bed. My sister Karla was not a fan.”

Newt, recalling a dark haired little girl who used to constantly pinch a young Hermann, muttered, “Of course she wasn’t.”

Hermann hummed in agreement, “And by then Dietrich was too old for such things. He was fully engaged in learning more about politics.”

The last was said with no small amount of disgust and Newt found himself adding, “No doubt, your father helped him with that.”

Hermann looked up at him sharply and Newt suddenly realized he was digging far too deep into what he had uncovered in their Drift. Unlike Hermann, he openly colored, “Ahhh…sorry…’bout that. That’s-that’s none of my business…”

Hermann looked away from him, “Doesn’t matter. You’ll have to deal with it soon enough.”

An uncomfortable silence settled between them, one Newt tentatively broke, “Yeah, but…um…so will you. So, do you…ah…do you really want to go to this… thing?”

Hermann closed his eyes and nodded to himself, “Yes. Just remember what I told you. Be yourself. Absolutely and totally yourself.”

With that Hermann left, smiling bitterly to himself. He knew perfectly well that bringing someone like Newton home was a sure fire way to guarantee that he would not have to travel home for any future visits. And – thinking of Dietrich, Karla, and, most importantly, his father - that suited him just fine.

§

Marshall Hansen was surprisingly helpful when it came to their transport and soon enough the small helicopter they were in set down on a very discreet landing pad not far from what Newt assumed was some sort of big, important government building. Or possibly a museum. Maybe an art gallery? It was hard to tell. Whatever the large, grey stone structure was, it was big and imposing and ancient looking…and also familiar, though he couldn’t place his finger on why.

A long, sleek black car waited for them. A man in a finely tailored suit stood to one side of the vehicle and he bowed to them as they grew closer. He addressed Hermann directly, “Mr. Gottlieb, your mother sent me to personally escort both you and your guest.”

“Of course she did,” Hermann sighed wearily, “Very well, let’s get on with it.”

The man held the car door open and Newt slid in, eyeing Hermann the whole time. Once they were in the back of the car Newt couldn’t help but ask, “Your mom has a valet?”

“My mother has everything,” Hermann admitted, not meeting his eyes, “Cooks, gardeners, butlers, maids…the whole lot. Growing up I had several dedicated nannies as well as personal tutors until such and such time as my intellect surpassed their own, which wasn’t very long.”

Newt tried to digest that, “My mom taught me how to tie my shoes, did the laundry, and cooked macaroni and cheese for dinner three times a week.”

Hermann didn’t comment on that but felt a smirk tug at his lips. Thanks to the Drift he remembered those macaroni dinners. He also remembered afterwards, after the Drift had faded, how jealous of them he had been. He was still, in fact, jealous. Jealous of Newton of all things. It was like a nightmare.

Newt peered out of the car windows at the big, fancy architectural-delight of a building they were passing as they drove by, “Weird that we were dropped off here and not at some airport. But then maybe this is some super, special, secret landing spot the PDCC always uses.”

“What on earth are you yammering about?”

“I’m just wondering why they dropped us off near some museum instead of, you know, somewhere closer to a major roadway where we could get to your house.”

Hermann pointed at the building, “That is my house.”

Newt looked at Hermann then at the building, and then back again, “You’re fucking kidding me!”

“Your language, Doctor Geiszler…”

“No!” Newt’s voice reached that high pitch that Hermann was always amazed it could take, “No, you told me to be myself and this is me, being myself, asking you if you are _fucking_ kidding me! That is _not_ a house. That’s not even a mansion. That is-that is,” he waved at it, “That is a _castle_!”

“It is not a _castle_. Don’t be so overdramatic. It is merely my family estate. It has been passed down from eldest child to eldest child for generations.”

Newt just let out huffs of shocked air for a while before managing to sputter, “I’m sure it has!”

“I don’t see what the fuss is all about.”

“The fuss? The fact that you’re like some kind of secret royalty or lord or duke or I-don’t-know-what-title-you-hold but rich! Rich! Hermann, your family is rich!”

“We are rather wealthy, yes,” Hermann conceded, “But that is no reason for you to go to pieces.”

“I’m not going to pieces,” Newt hissed, “But you can’t blame a guy for being a little shocked! I thought this place looked kinda familiar, which, now that I think back on it, probably had to do with the Drift and yeah, I always suspected you came from money because you’ve always come across as a snooty, well-bred asshole but not _this_ kind of money! Not I-grew-up-in-a-palace kind of money!”

“The Gottlieb estate is not a palace either,” Hermann rubbed at his face in frustration, “It is a large homestead, yes, but it is none of these ridiculous things you are calling it. And as for my family’s wealth, while I admit it is of no small importance, it is not what we are here to focus on. We are here to focus on getting through this weekend in one piece. Once this is all over you and I shall return to the Shatterdome and return to our work and we can forget all about this, understood?”

Newt bounced about in his seat, “I don’t know if I want to forget all about this. Unlike you, I grew up in a two bedroom that rested over a nightclub with my folks. Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t awful but this? Maids, butlers, personal drivers…we’re going to get pampered, am I right?”

Hermann loathed saying this aloud, “Possibly.”

“Finally!” Newt crowed, “I’m going to be treated like the rock star I am!”

It was official. Hermann hated his life.

§

The car pulled to a halt out front and Newt reached for the handle to let himself out only to have the valet beat him to it. Newt’s grin grew worse if anything as he bounded out of the car. Hermann took his time, not only because of his leg but because he really wasn’t looking forward to this. But as he had told Newton, best to get this over with.

Much to his surprise, Newt was waiting for him and even offered a helping hand. Hermann was reluctant to take it but eventually acquiesced. After all, it was easier to get his balance right this way. He held firmly on to one of Newt’s hands as he drew himself from the vehicle, his cane meeting the smooth pavement with a very audible click.

Just as he was about to release Newt’s hand he heard several more quick clicks in rushed, successive order and just as he realized it was the sound of high heels, he saw his mother rushing forward. Helen Gottlieb was not a particularly tall woman but she somehow came across as towering as she strode forward. Her face was nearly wrinkle-free and she was in impeccable shape, wearing a tight fitting black dress that accentuated her chin length silver hair.

Newt looked her up and down, “Who’s that?”

“That would be my mother.”

Newt thought the day couldn’t hold any more surprises but he was clearly dead wrong, eyes yet again going almost comically large, “ _That’s_ your mother? She’s a fox!”

Hermann glared at him, “I do not appreciate your implication that my mother is some sort of beast.”

Newt groaned, “Christ! And you call _me_ the idiot! I’m saying she’s a fox. It means she’s attractive. Hot. Your mom is hot. You’ve got a hot mom.”

Hermann was seriously contemplating hitting Newt with his cane when his mother was close enough to speak; her voice casual but warm, “Hermann, my darling boy…”

She kissed each of his cheeks and then turned to Newt, “And you must be Doctor Geiszler.”

“You can call me Newt.” He implored and Helen laughed lightly, “Ah, yes, my son told me you had an unusual nickname, something reptilian in nature. And just look at you…you are just as colourful as he described.”

Her eyes lingered over his leather jacket and then came to rest on their linked hands. Hermann, catching this, released Newt’s hand and felt the tips of his ears burning. Honestly. He was hardly ever physical with anyone ever and in the last few minutes he had been kissed on his face by his mother and held hands with his deplorable lab partner. It was really too much.

For her part, Helen did not comment, her eyes redirecting themselves to Hermann’s, “I’m glad to see you’ve kept the coat.”

Hermann tugged self-consciously at the fur lined hood, “Yes. Thank you.”

She turned to Newt, “I purchased that for him a long time ago. I didn’t want him to catch a chill while saving the world. Despite his claims to the contrary, he can be quite absent minded. But I’m sure you already know that.”

“I know that he loves that coat. He wears it all the time.” Newt offered and Hermann shifted his cane to press down on his foot. Newt hissed and pulled away from him, scowling. Helen’s eyes darted between the two of them and then she smiled, “Well, I am glad to hear it. Now, let’s get inside, hmm? It’s cold out here.”

Helen turned and walked away quickly. Hermann started to follow only to have Newt stop him, “Hey, shouldn’t we get our bags?”

Hermann sneered at him, “You said you wanted to be pampered, did you not? No doubt it’s all already been arranged and your things will be taken to your room for you.”

Newt’s expression was one of such awe that Hermann could only shake his head in dismay. He started towards the house and Newt kept pace with him, hands deep in his pockets, “So, look, um, I know we haven’t…ah…talked about it much but the, y’know, the drift?”

Hermann sighed wearily, “Yes?”

“Well, it’s just…it’s weird, isn’t it? I sort of remember this place but I didn’t recognize your mom or remember the bit about the servants and the money. Don’t you think that’s strange?”

“No, not particularly,” Hermann returned, “I haven’t seen my mother in years, she’s barely recognizable to me and no doubt any thoughts and memories you saw would not have circled over this place and its inhabitants overmuch. Also, let us not forget that our drift was not at all like what the jaeger pilots do. Yes, we shared the neural load and merged our thoughts and memories but instead of doing so through the proper equipment, connected to a machine we did so with a contraption you put together from garbage, connected to a kaiju.”

“I know, I know. I just…I think we should compare notes, compile data….there’s just so much to be explored in what we did-”

“I agree,” Hermann interrupted tartly, “Which is why I wish to get this over with as quickly as possible!”

“Well, we didn’t have to come…”

“Oh yes, we did,” Hermann muttered, “While our drift might have been different than most, I am sure you are somewhat aware of the tenacity my family can display when they want something.”

Newt snorted, “I wouldn’t even have had to drift with you to know that! You’re rather ‘tenacious’ yourself. Though that’s not the word I would use. The word _I_ would use is-”

Hermann cut him off loudly, “Not fit for conversation, I’m sure!”

“Oh, you know what I was going to say?”

“Again, the drift may have been different but at its core, the same process. I’ve been inside your mind, Doctor Geiszler, and it is a rather filthy place.”

“Thought you were calling me Newton now? And by the way, your mom is right; it’s cold out here. You’re so pale, you look like Noseferatu. You should pull that coat tighter around yourself. Here, let me help...” Newt turned to Hermann and grabbed both of the drawstrings on either side of his hood, tugging them sharply. The hood closed up to a tiny hole with only Hermann’s nose visible.

Newt chuckled and left him there to struggle with his coat as he walked into the house. Inside he found exactly what he expected to find. Opulence and lots of it. The floor was dark, polished wood and a massive chandelier hung overhead, glittering brightly. Paintings and sculptures lined the walls and to both the left and right were long corridors to several rooms. Straight ahead was a massive staircase that branched off in both directions and this is where Helen stood, talking to some of the staff.

Hermann came in right after him, mumbling under his breath in German, his coat fixed, the hood knocked back completely. He looked ready to confront Newt on what he had done and no doubt launch them into one of their normal arguments only to be halted as a voice sounded from the top of the staircase, “So…you did come.”

Hermann and Newton looked up to see Karla walking gracefully down the stairs. Three children trailed behind her, two boys and one girl. It was evident that they were doing their very best to behave but that it was difficult for them to remain still.

Karla looked at Newt with one raised eyebrow, “And you brought Lizard with you.”

“I’m Newt,” he corrected sharply and Karla’s lips twitched, “Hmm, yes. I’ve had access to your history, Doctor Geiszler; you have quite...eclectic tastes.”

Newt turned to Hermann, “What’s she talking about?”

“She’s had access to your computer, I’m afraid.”

“What?”

Karla looked exceedingly pleased with herself, “You see, that’s what I do. Each of us has our own special skills. Dietrich’s good with words, Hermann with numbers, and I, I’m good with both. And I tend to use it towards technology, in particular, computers.”

“So, you’re a hacker?”

“Oh,” she gave him a pretend pout, “That’s such an ugly word for it.”

Hermann said with soft menace, “It _is_ inaccurate. Karla’s not so much a hacker as someone who likes to steal secrets and use them to her advantage. In other words, she’s a thief.”

Karla glared at him, “That’s an even uglier word.”

“What can I say, Karla? What you do is not pretty. However I see your children are coming along nicely. One hopes that they will continue to not take after you.”

Karla looked ready to tear him apart when Helen interrupted them, “You would both do well to keep your tongues behind your teeth if you cannot be civilized. We have a guest,” she gestured to Newt, “Not to mention that while the holidays are over we are here to celebrate them albeit belatedly.”

Karla and Hermann both seethed silently and Newt wondered what exactly he had gotten himself into. Helen, for her part, seemed unconcerned and she turned to the children, “Carsten, Antje, Valter…say hello.”  


The children came out from behind their mother and seemed happy enough to see Hermann, shuffling over quickly. Hermann couldn’t help but relax at the sight of them and pointed to each in turn, “Newton, this is Carsten, he’s Karla’s eldest at ten, followed by Antje who is…hmm, I seem to have forgotten…”

This was said in a light, playful way and Antje puffed up, “I’m six!”

“Ah, that’s right. Very good. And how old is Valter?”

“Four!” All three said at once and Hermann grinned. Newt’s eyebrows knitted together as he looked at him, stunned. Who was this man next to him? There was no way Hermann – _his_ Hermann – was good with kids. He seemed more like the type to wave his cane and scream at them about getting off his lawn or something.

But as he watched their interactions memories washed over him. _Hermann putting a band-aid on his younger brother Bastien’s knee. Holding Carsten when he was first born. Tucking Antje into bed. And no, no, there are no kaiju under your bed. See? I’ve checked for you. Besides, that would be statistically impossible and I’ve told you all about statistics and you like numbers and you are so small and bright and wonderful and curious and you don’t judge me, don’t look at me and my twisted leg like I’m broken and it’s no fair and Karla, how could she have made you and how can she deserve you and how…_

Newt shook his head, staggering slightly and Hermann looked at him with concern, “Are you alright?”

He breathed out loudly through his nose and blinked, “What?”

“You were off balance.”

“Yeah,” Carsten said, “You did this.”

He reeled from left to right far more dramatically than Newt had but both Antje and Valter followed suit until all three of them were weaving about. Newt couldn’t help but smirk at the sight of them, “No, no…I’m good. It’s nice to meet you all.”

“Children,” Karla called and they walked back over to her reluctantly, turning to look behind themselves now and then as they went, their eyes directed mostly on Newt. Once they reached her she gave them a soft smile, “You will all have plenty of time later to talk with your uncle and his…friend. But first you should all wash up. Dinner will be ready soon.”

They nodded and disappeared up the stairs. Karla crossed her arms, “I see you both are still suffering from the after effects of your drift.”

Helen frowned, “Drift?”

“Yes, it was in some of the PDCC inner office memos I encountered. Apparently Hermann risked his life with this fellow here by experimentally drifting with a kaiju.”

Helen looked absolutely horrified and Hermann’s voice was ice cold as he addressed Karla, “That is none of your concern.”

“Why? Because it’s a secret? According to you, I use those to my advantage but where is the advantage in telling our mother past upsetting her? I told her because she _deserves_ to know and for no other reason than that. I’m surprised she didn’t notice your eye.” Karla looked down at her fingernails as she blithely tossed this out and Helen charged over to Hermann, inspecting his face closely. One hand went to her mouth, “Oh my! Your poor eye!”

Hermann rubbed at the cheek beneath his red rimmed eye and Newt found himself doing the same when Helen looked at him, “Newton! You have one too? Both of you!”

“It’s my fault;” Newt offered weakly, “Hermann only did it to help me.”

Helen let out a sad breath, “No, dear, it’s no one’s fault. If you both did…what Karla said you did, I’m sure it was for the best. After all, you closed the Breach and put those monsters to rest. But I’m just…I’m glad you’re okay.”

“I am too, for what it’s worth,” Karla offered glibly, “And you can feel free to rest easy with the knowledge that I have not told our father.”

Hermann would never in a million years admit that he did relax considerably when she told him that. Karla was many things but she was not a liar. No, in fact, she was by far one of the most truthful people he had ever had the displeasure of knowing. He regarded her with some concentration, “Since you were poking around in the PDCC files, can I safely assume it was you who trifled with my dossier?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Please,” Hermann chided, “I had a look at it recently and discovered, much to my surprise, that is says that I am not only married to Vanessa but that we’re expecting our first child.”

Karla let out a genuine laugh, “You forget, brother dear, who taught me my computer skills in the first place. I would think you would look to our mother for that one.”

Hermann did indeed look at his mother who looked terribly sheepish as she scratched at the back of her neck, “Well…”

“Mother!”

She shrugged, “If you had stayed with Vanessa you might very well be married by now and with a child on the way!”

“But I’m not!”  


“I know, I know. It was just wishful thinking on my part.”

“Wishful thinking that you felt made it okay for you to falsify my dossier!” This was not a question but a statement of out and out exasperation and Helen glared at him, “How was I to know you had moved on? You’ve barely spoken to me in years! Had I know you had someone new in your life, I would have never done such a thing.”

This drew him up short, “Someone new?”

“And you needn’t worry; I am quite delighted by it. Vanessa was a sweet girl and certainly as smart as you, but I think this will be a much better match. Opposites attract, as they say, and you and her were far too similar. I am sure it is much better now, having someone who can shake things up for you.”

“Shake…?” Hermann trailed off, still lost. Newt, who was much quicker to catch on, started to shake his head and was about to deny it when a terrible gleam entered Karla’s eyes and she laughed dryly, “Oh Mother! You can’t be serious. You think they’re romantically involved?”

“Who?” Hermann breathed even though he damn well knew. But his towering intellect seemed to be failing him in the light of something so completely and utterly insane.

“Mother,” Karla said with some pity, “There is no way on earth that Hermann is dating that man. It was nothing short of a miracle when he was dating Vanessa and we all know how that turned out.”

“You’re right.” Newt said with loud clarity and suddenly everyone was looking at him. He edged closer to Hermann, “Hermann and I are not dating.”

Then, much to Hermann’s shock, Newt threw his arm around him and tugged him close, “We’re, ah, we’re actually engaged.”

Hermann was positive his heart had leapt into his throat. His mind began rattling off in numbers and figures trying to right itself, trying to make sense of this insanity the only way it knew how but it couldn’t seem to keep up as Newton just. Kept. Talking.

“Yeah, we were going to keep it a surprise, you know? Sort of a belated holiday gift thing but guess the cat’s out of the bag, right…sugar…face?” The last bit came out in the most uncertain tone ever.

Hermann’s mouth had literally dropped open and his lips were trembling as he tried to think, tried to speak, tried to make sense of what on earth was happening. Helen, for her part, looked thrilled, “Are you really?”

“Yup. We don’t have a date yet but Hermann’s going to be my wife. Husband!” Newt shouted then continued to ramble on quickly, nervously, “Wife-husband, husband-wife, husband-husband…my…husband…he’s going to be…ahh…”

Karla’s eyes were narrowed, “You’re getting married?”

“Yes.” Newt returned to her firmly.

“You asked him to marry you.” This was not a question from her as much as an accusation.

“I did,” he replied with almost an overzealous relish, “Yeah, I’m a real romantic. I asked him and he said yes and we’re getting married, so, you know. You were wrong. Very wrong. Totally and utterly wrong.”

Karla appeared livid at that but Newt just looked surer of himself and gave Hermann a squeeze as he looked at Helen, “I hope you don’t mind…”

“I don’t mind at all!” Helen said, radiating with happiness, “This is wonderful! Wonderful!”

“Yeah, see? It’s wonderful,” Newt assured Hermann and, noticing his mouth was still hanging open, said softly, “Might want to close your mouth there, buddy.”

Hermann’s mouth closed with an audible click and he turned to merely stare at Newt, eyes wide. Newt avoided his gaze, instead looking at Helen as he said, “I’m very glad you approve, Mrs. Gottlieb.”

“I do! And-and I’m sure Hermann’s father will as well…”

Hermann clutched his cane so tight his knuckles turned white and he eased away from Newt, his voice coming out in a hoarse whisper, “I…need to sit down.”

Helen shook her head, “Oh, of course you do! Mildred!”

A thin, pretty faced maid arrived and Helen smiled at her, “Would you please escort my son and his,” she paused and let out a pleased exhale, “fiancé to their room?”

Mildred nodded and Helen chuckled, “I had arranged with her earlier to give you two your own wing when you first got here. Even then I knew something was going on between you two!”

Newt’s eyebrows rose, “We have our own _wing_?”

“Yes. The east wing, plenty of privacy. I’ve put you both in the blue room. I thought it fitting, what with your interactions with the kaiju. Granted, I didn’t know how involved you were with them. Drifting with one!” she shuddered but still looked blissful, “You will have to tell me all about it later! But for now, go get some rest. I’ll send someone to you when dinner is prepared.”

Hermann turned and slowly staggered after Mildred, Newt at his heels. Newt was chattering as they walked, remarking on this and that about the house and their own private wing and how he couldn’t believe the elegance of everything around him but Hermann wasn’t listening.  
No, instead a dull ache was beginning behind his eyes and it wasn’t until they were shown to their room and Mildred was long gone and they were all alone that Hermann broke, fairly screaming, “Are you out of your bloody mind!”

Newt’s head reared back, “Wow! Is that anyway to talk to your fiancé?”

Hermann raised his cane, more than prepared to finally do it, to finally kill this absolutely infuriating man when Newt dashed away from him, both hands held up defensively, “Look, look, don’t pretend that you don’t know why you brought me here, okay? Despite what you may think, I’m _not_ an idiot. You know why you brought me here and more importantly, _I_ know why you brought me here. You brought me here as a big screw you gesture to your family. Which, by the way, is pretty low.”

Hermann didn’t deny it and Newt didn’t expect him to, hurrying on, “But, for what it’s worth, it’s also pretty understandable. I’ve been in your head so I have all kinds of memories of your dad and Dietrich and Karla and none of them are particularly warm and fuzzy. So, I was willing to go along with this, you know? Be kind of more spastic than usual, all punk rock star but then your sister comes in with her big mouth and she was always pinching and shoving and ratting you out and-”

“My memories?” Hermann huffed out, “You’re using _my_ memories as validation for your ludicrous actions?”

“Come on, you got to admit, you loved it when I told her she was wrong,” Newt remarked smugly, “The look on her face alone…”

Again, Hermann could not deny this but he still felt the need to object, “But you and I are not affianced!”

Newt’s head reared back and he laughed a little, “Really? Affianced? Who says that? Engaged, Hermann, we’re engaged.”

“But we are _not_ -”

“Yeah, I know that and you know that but they don’t and I don’t see the harm in letting them think otherwise. I’m just taking what you wanted a step further. That’s all.”

Hermann sat down on the bed, the dull ache behind his eyes getting worse as he tried to grapple with yet another bout of Newt’s obvious insanity. How could a person who was the second youngest student ever admitted to MIT come up with such stupid Machiavellian schemes? First drifting with a kaiju and now this. Surely one was worse than the other but frankly at this moment he found it difficult to quantify which. As far as he was concerned, both involved meddling with monsters that would be best left alone.  


Since he hadn’t spoken up Newt pressed his advantage, “Come on, it’ll be easy. Lots of people say we bicker like an old married couple anyway. Just go along with it. I promise you, I’ll drive your sister up the wall,” then he added as a quick after thought, “But not your mom. I like her. Same goes for the kids.”

“I would never ask you to upset my mother nor Karla’s children,” Hermann fairly spit with outrage but, calming considerably, added, “You can, however, abuse Karla as much as you wish.”

“Thank you. I assume the same goes for Dietrich.”

“Naturally.”

“Bastien?”

“I’ve never had much issue with him. I’d be surprised if he even shows his face.”

“Speaking of…” Newt started cautiously and Hermann sighed heavily, “Yes, my father…my father is not likely to see us. No doubt he’s sequestered himself in his library as he is often wont to do but should he make an appearance…”

“Hit him with both barrels?”

Hermann couldn’t help but smirk, “Your garish markings alone will set his teeth on edge.”

“What? These?” Newt took his leather jacket off and rolled up his sleeves, displaying his tattoos. Hermann nodded and Newt smiled, “So, you’re in?”

Hermann shook his head, “This is utter lunacy…”

“You’re in though?”

Hermann refused to say the words but instead eyed Newt, “Why would you do this?”

Newt’s shoulders rose and fell and while he tried his best to look nonchalant he failed utterly when he said, “You helped me. You didn’t…you didn’t have to drift with me and you did, so…you know…friends help each other out.”

“Is that what we are? Friends?” Hermann meant to ask this with far more rancor but somehow it came out soft and vulnerable and he hated himself for it. Newt shifted his weight from one foot to the other, “I-I don’t know. What…what do you think we are?”

Newt asked the question as if he was afraid of the answer. Hermann breathed out loudly and looked around the room for lack of a better answer. It was indeed a blue room - the wallpaper, the furniture and comforter all varying shades of blue broken up with the occasional creamy white throw or gold gilded mirror. Like the rest of the house it boasted a dark, glossy wooden floor though plush carpets were placed in strategic locations. 

His mother had always had an eye for decorating. The bed he was sitting on was massive and rested in an ornate wooden framework that boasted four posters and an intricately carved headboard. He idly ran his hand along one of the posters before rising to stand, “At this point I would say we are coconspirators in what is no doubt a foolish endeavor.”

Newt walked over and clapped him on the shoulder, “Yeah! That’s the spirit!”

Just as Hermann was about to talk about how, exactly, they were going to go about this there was a knock on the door and his mother’s voice calling out, “Hello?”

“Quick!” Newt cried and, grabbing big handfuls of the lapels of Hermann’s coat, he dragged him over and kissed him full on the mouth. Hermann’s eyes widened as Newt’s lips slanted over his, wet and warm and he let out a strange, muted sound of shock at the action.

Helen walked in and, seeing them kissing, blushed, “Oh, dear me! Sorry!”

Newt pulled away and was all innocent smiles, “Don’t apologize, Mrs. Gottlieb.”

“Well, I certainly didn’t mean to interrupt,” she assured, “But I wanted to tell you dinner was ready myself.”

“Cool. We’ll be there in a sec,” Newt promised and then, much to Hermann’s continued shock, drew him back over and kissed him again. The hand Hermann used to grip his cane tightened and his other free hand floated up, almost of its own volition, to rest on the back of Newt’s head, tangling briefly in his hair, easing him even closer if that was possible.

Helen left and, once gone, Newt drew back, panting slightly, “Alright, okay, that was…good.”

Hermann merely looked at him, eyes wide, and felt his head bobbing slightly. Newt grinned, “This is going to be interesting.”

With that he practically darted out of the room. Hermann stood there for a few more minutes, still stunned. He licked his lips and tasted cinnamon and something else, something inexplicable and he knew it was Newt and he really, really wished that there was some equation he could use to make sense of all of this.

Instead he found himself walking towards the dining room and god only knew what else.

**Author's Note:**

> Based on this prompt from [The Pacific Rim Kink Meme](http://pacificrimkink.livejournal.com/):
> 
>  
> 
> _So I imagine Hermann probably has this really old-fashioned snooty family who are like "ugh you're still single of course you are we won't put a plus one on the christmas card ever" which really annoys Hermann because he's in no hurry to find anyone but he also really wants to prove them wrong. But how?_
> 
> _Enter a sleepy Newton, walking into the lab and yawning and being all Newt-like. A lightbulb goes off in Hermann's head._
> 
> _He somehow convinces Newton to come home with him to England for a little bit, because holidays are a thing they're allowed to take now that the world isn't immediately in danger. Newt is totally amused by the whole thing and Hermann is really into the idea of his family being annoyed by his punk!scientist boyfriend._
> 
> _He doesn't anticipate that his family will actually like Newt. Unfortunately though, that's exactly what happens. As if that wasn't bad enough, he finds himself starting to like Newt a little bit, too._
> 
>  
> 
> I don't know why I'm such a big fan of writing Character A meets Character B's family and hijinks ensue, but if anyone's read my Sherlock fic of the same ilk, apparently I just am. 
> 
> I took the names of Hermann's father, sister, and two brothers from the novelization and I play around with that canon a bit as well, though I mostly stuck with what was seen within the film. The rest of the names of Hermann's family are of my own creation. Any mistakes made are my own as well. Hopefully you read and enjoy! ;)
> 
> Visit me on my tumblr if you would like: http://cellard00rs.tumblr.com/


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